Oscars: The Search for Belonging on the Red Carpet
The Oscars. The Academy Awards. Hollywood's Biggest Night.
These are all the names given in recognizing the best in film and motion picture. When my editor's email arrived with the subject line: "Red Carpet," my initial reaction was unadulterated excitement. But then, doubt crept in like an uninvited guest at a vegan potluck. Here I was, a champion of inner peace, about to be thrust into the lion's den of celebrity and flashing lights.
What seemed like an easy yes was dimmed and had to be reassured by a good friend's urging. Even though I cover lifestyle and wellness, all the ways of not attending poured into my brain. What I realized I was trying to escape from was a fear of not belonging in a sea of Hollywood’s elite. Imposter syndrome is defined as "the persistent inability to believe that one's success is deserved or has been legitimately achieved as a result of one's own efforts or skills," but it wasn't that. And it wasn't that nagging inner critic, either. I have interviewed celebrities and CEOs of Fortune 100 companies before — it wasn't about feeling inadequate.
Hours before arriving in the hallowed halls of Beverly Hills' Annual Academy Awards Celebration, I confided in a college friend. His words, simple yet powerful: "Just remember, all of us are just looking for love." A truth I knew, yet somehow forgotten. Surrounded by glittering gowns and perfectly-pressed tuxedos, it hit me — the deeper truth I craved wasn't external validation, but a sense of belonging within myself.
The night itself? A whirlwind for the senses. Glitz, glam, and practiced smiles filled the air. But beneath the surface, a different story unfolded. Fleeting glances revealed hidden anxieties, genuine connections sparked over shared vulnerabilities. The elaborate outfits and forced poses? An attempt to be truly seen, a desire we all share.
It was a magical night, but it was also a night of clarity. I realized a few things that I hope will carry you on those moments when it's time for you to shine even though you feel a little lackluster:
💰 All that glitters isn't gold. The behind-the-scenes is a chaotic mess.
🎭 The primping and posing...they’re just masks.
🎬 Hollywood may represent wealth, fame, and success, but the external world is just a moment in time; it eventually fades.
🔮 Being present is not a metaphysical concept; it's a reminder that yesterday is gone, and tomorrow is only a light-speed away.
🛡️ Feeling safe is not just a physical experience; it's a call to cultivate that within yourself.
💁♂️ When you are confident just being, it attracts people to you (thanks to several attendees who showered me with compliments on my bomb embroidered colorful tuxedo jacket). 😎
My younger self would have chased after-parties until sunrise. This wiser version, a few more life experiences under his belt, embraced the simple truth: to each their own season.
Marla Gibbs (of the 1970s hit show The Jeffersons), the legendary actress with whom I had the honor of welcoming that evening (and recipient of the Lifetime Achievement Award), her show's iconic theme song kept echoing in my mind: "Well, we're movin' on up…”
This wasn't just about the Oscars; it was about the red carpet within, where the search for belonging truly begins.
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